She Sleeps Tight / Will Dockery (video & text)

[Will Dockery]

_She Sleeps Tight_
By Will Dockery
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Won't be long,
 until I see her face.
 She's waiting
 in an undisclosed place.
 I've been conspired
 banned from my muse.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 In Salem town
 she keeps her chin so high.
 Darkened breeze
 she smiles as I roll by.
 Step inside
 she looks for tables left.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Like a Steamboat
 she plans to roll on down.
 To the Gulf
 out of this dirty town.
 Copper mesh
 kept stuffed in a jar.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 We know him
 eye deed by his ship.
 In a trap
 a kind of goosechase trip.
 Whiskey fumes
 and stale gunsmoke.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
--
_She Sleeps Tight (pastiche)_

"Edit" or "Remix" are more appropriate labels for what Adam does

By Adam Lynn
 Darkened Salem town leather breeze.
 Whiskey scattered shoes in the snow.
 Poor boy's stale dirty gun-smoke jokes
 wink at time. She keeps her steamboat
 drowned copper fumes and knives
 stuffed in a jar. Nothing lasts.
 Your self turning from wine to water.
 Conspired smiles with all her nowhere
 coins and goose-chase cold dice.
 --

Gosh, I don't know, Will  I kind of like Adams more than yours.
Is that wrong?
:  )

Adam's a good editor, I suppose, if he brought out the best in my
writing, I guess... I suppose I'll give him credit as "Editor" on
future versions, if I use them. I do have an interesting experiment in
mind which will make use of Adam's edit of my poem. It will take a bit
of studio time to assemble, but it will be worth it to see how it
sounds.

I'll post a link when this is complete, of course.

--
"She Sleeps Tight" by Will Dockery:

[Hieronymous DCCVII]

Post by Will Dockery
"Edit" or "Remix" are more appropriate labels for what Adam does

Labels are just labels, really. If you like the label "Edit" or
"Remix", then you certainly have the option of applying it to any of
your future work. Adam chose to label his work a "pastiche", which is
not entirely unlike an edit or a remix, but isn't exactly an edit or a
remix either. Adam's label fits what he did well. In that respect,
edit or remix are not more appropriate labels for what Adam wrote.

[mat1t3]

Post by Will Dockery

_She Sleeps Tight_
By Will Dockery
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Won't be long,
 until I see her face.
 She's waiting
 in an undisclosed place.
 I've been conspired
 banned from my muse.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 In Salem town
 she keeps her chin so high.
 Darkened breeze
 she smiles as I roll by.
 Step inside
 she looks for tables left.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Like a Steamboat
 she plans to roll on down.
 To the Gulf
 out of this dirty town.
 Copper mesh
 kept stuffed in a jar.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 We know him
 eye deed by his ship.
 In a trap
 a kind of goosechase trip.
 Whiskey fumes
 and stale gunsmoke.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
--
_She Sleeps Tight (pastiche)_

"Edit" or "Remix" are more appropriate labels for what Adam does

By Adam Lynn
 Darkened Salem town leather breeze.
 Whiskey scattered shoes in the snow.
 Poor boy's stale dirty gun-smoke jokes
 wink at time. She keeps her steamboat
 drowned copper fumes and knives
 stuffed in a jar. Nothing lasts.
 Your self turning from wine to water.
 Conspired smiles with all her nowhere
 coins and goose-chase cold dice.
 --

Gosh, I don't know, Will  I kind of like Adams more than yours.
Is that wrong?
:  )

Adam's a good editor, I suppose, if he brought out the best in my
writing, I guess... I suppose I'll give him credit as "Editor" on
future versions, if I use them. I do have an interesting experiment in
mind which will make use of Adam's edit of my poem. It will take a bit
of studio time to assemble, but it will be worth it to see how it
sounds.
I'll post a link when this is complete, of course.
--
"She Sleeps Tight" by Will http://youtu.be/3D9uGY157cpiU

hmmm...yes...this looks like the beginnings
of a possible collaboration of sorts. You could
hire Adam on as your editor. Actually, you could
have him deliver the pizzas while you sit
in the local Dunk&Dine and scribble out your
drool. Then, when he returns from one of
his runs, he can turn your "work" into a real
poem.

Has he given you his personal info?
You might wanna look him up.

: )

[Will Dockery]

Post by mat1t3

Post by Will Dockery

_She Sleeps Tight_
By Will Dockery
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Dice and coins
 scattered in the snow.
 Won't be long,
 until I see her face.
 She's waiting
 in an undisclosed place.
 I've been conspired
 banned from my muse.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 This won't stick
 poor boy's all confused.
 In Salem town
 she keeps her chin so high.
 Darkened breeze
 she smiles as I roll by.
 Step inside
 she looks for tables left.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Wink at time
 nothing lasts except yourself.
 Like a Steamboat
 she plans to roll on down.
 To the Gulf
 out of this dirty town.
 Copper mesh
 kept stuffed in a jar.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 Sharp cold hit
 turning wine to water.
 We know him
 eye deed by his ship.
 In a trap
 a kind of goosechase trip.
 Whiskey fumes
 and stale gunsmoke.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sunk and drowned
 with all her knives and jokes.
 Sleeps so tight
 she has a marksman's eye.
 Maker's mark
 tattoo firewater spine.
 Leather shoes
 but nowhere to go.
--
_She Sleeps Tight (pastiche)_

"Edit" or "Remix" are more appropriate labels for what Adam does

By Adam Lynn
 Darkened Salem town leather breeze.
 Whiskey scattered shoes in the snow.
 Poor boy's stale dirty gun-smoke jokes
 wink at time. She keeps her steamboat
 drowned copper fumes and knives
 stuffed in a jar. Nothing lasts.
 Your self turning from wine to water.
 Conspired smiles with all her nowhere
 coins and goose-chase cold dice.

You could
hire Adam on as your editor. Actually, you could

[...]

Post by mat1t3
his runs, he can turn your "work" into a real poem.

A real poem? So your opinion is that "She Sleeps Tight" is "not a
poem" already, Matt?

--
"She Sleeps Tight" by Will Dockery: